Week In Review

Highest Weight: 263lbs

WW Starting Weight: 231.8lbs

Last Week's Weight: 227.0lbs

Today's Weight: 225.2lbs

Woohoo! 1.8lbs gone! I was very happy to see that number this morning when I stepped on the scale. I actually made myself a goal to be under 225lbs by my first day back at work, which is Tuesday, so we'll see if I get there. Even if I don't, I'm very happy with WW and how I am feeling lately. I am really working hard to realize that health and happiness is more than a number on a scale!

Anyway, on to the week in review:

Diet:

Food was great this week. I actually had a splurge night on Saturday when my hubs and I went out for a date night (only our 2nd night away from our son this year!). I had a very reasonable meal of shrimp and scallops, but then splurged on chocolate cake for dessert. It was definitely worth it! Even with my splurge meal, I only used about half of my weekly points since I worked out so much and use my activity points before my weeklies. Apart from that night, my eating was very clean and healthy. I've been doing better with eating fruit at night, and I think it helps fill me up better. I made some delicious meals this week (including teriyaki meatballs & butternut squash pasta) and all went well!

Exercise:

Once again, I worked out 6 of 7 days this week. As part of that, I started Jillian Michaels Body Revolution and am totally loving it! She works you so hard in such a short amount of time, which is perfect for this busy momma. I also am already feeling stronger, which is exciting. The only thing I changed up a bit from the program is that instead of doing the cardio DVD which was on schedule for yesterday, I ran outside instead. I figure it's fine to switch cardio for cardio, and the weather was too perfect not to run (mid-60s with a breeze). I had a fantastic run and could tell that BR is helping me get stronger, which in turn makes running easier. I think I need to find a fall 5k to run!

Mental Health:

If you couldn't tell already, I am feeling fantastic right now! Everything seems to be clicking into place and I just feel so alive. It's awesome. I love when my head gets in the zone like this. While I know the feeling won't last forever, I'm going to roll with it for as long as I can.

Friday Weigh-in

Highest Weight: 263lbs
WW Starting Weight: 231.8lbs
Last Week's Weight: 227.8lbs
Today's Weight: 227.0lbs

Not going to lie, I was a little disappointed with this morning's weigh-in. Mostly because two days ago I was in the 225's. And then I had two great days, so not really sure what happened (ah, the danger of daily weigh-ins!). The only thing I'm thinking is that my system is probably a little backed up since I had to take Immodium on Wednesday due to a dental procedure (the joys of IBS...). So that's probably why, but it still kind of sucks. At least the scale went down, though!

Some of my favorite blogs do a sort of weekly round-up on weigh in days, so I thought I would start. Here goes:

Diet:

I think I did great this week with my diet. If anything, I am a little lacking with fruit, so my goal for next week is a minimum of 2 fruits a day. I do great with veggies in my meals, but whenever I snack I tend to go more towards carbs (pretzels, granola bars, etc) rather than fruit, so I need to work on that. My meals, though, we're great. I tried 2 new recipes (honey-soy chicken and buffalo chicken pasta) and they both turned out awesome.

Exercise:

I definitely killed it this week with exercise. Like, some type of movement every single day. Actually, I did formal workouts 6 out of 7 days, and on the 7th day I painted for 3 hours, so it was like a workout. My husband and I have also been going for nightly 2 mile walks with our son after dinner, which I love. I feel like it really helps with digestion and I feel so relaxed after our walks. I definitely want to keep up this habit next week.

Mental Health:

Honestly, I've been struggling with anxiety and negative thoughts this week. I always have issues with anxiety, but this week some depression snuck in, too. Yesterday was really bad. As in, I really wanted to give up on this weight loss journey and binge. But I didn't, and to me that is a huge victory. When I wanted to eat/binge, I did zumba instead. I honestly didn't enjoy the workout, but it kept me out of the kitchen for a while, which was necessary. Sometimes I just get so frustrated. I feel like I am trapped in this body that doesn't feel like mine and I just want all of the excess fat gone immediately. Then I start feeling bad about myself, my self confidence tanks, and I want to eat away the pain. It's such a vicious cycle. This week, I want to focus on my thoughts and trying to say more positive things to myself, rather than all this negative self-talk.


So that was my week. It wasn't perfect, but definitely a step in the right direction. This week, I am starting Body Revolution and am so freakin' excited! Also, my husband and I are going on a date-night tomorrow, which is sooo rare for us - as in, this is our 2nd time getting a babysitter this entire year - so that will be great.

Weight Watchers

So I mentioned in my last post that I am doing WW again. I wanted to explain my break in blogging and my reignited love for WW.

As you can see, there was a long gap between my last two posts. Honestly, things were going well, I was exercising a ton, eating a bit better (though my portions were still larger than they should have been) and then I went on vacation. For over 2 weeks. Yeah, everything basically fell apart. On vacation I ate a ton of fried food, so much sugar, and didn't workout at all. I got home feeling bloated and depressed. About 3 days after being home, I broke down while talking to my husband and told him how miserable I was. I felt sooo horrible physically. I had no energy, no stamina, and honestly didn't even feel like getting out of bed most mornings. I knew something had to change. I needed help.

Enter my old friend WW. Now, I am no stranger to WW. Honestly, I have started the program so many times I have lost track. But this time feels different. In the past, I have almost resented WW. Like, thinking it's not fair that I have to keep track of my food, figure out points, etc. This time, however, I just feel like I really need help and support, and WW can give me the guidance I need. So far I am a little over 2 weeks in and am loving it. I haven't lost a ton of weight yet (4lbs total) but I just feel soooo much better! I feel alive again. It's awesome.

Compared to the old WW, I love the new Points Plus. I think it is so great that fruits and veggies are free. It really does motivate me to eat more fruit (something I was definitely lacking before) and just makes me really think about 'balanced meals.'

So yeah, that's what I am up to. Counting points and working out 5 days a week (and of course taking care of my son and hanging with my awesome hubby). Work starts back up for me in a little over a week, so I'm hoping to feel really settled into the WW program when work starts so I can just keep going and working towards my goals.

In other news, I just bought and received Jillian Michael's Body Revolution and am going to officially start the 90-day program! I am so excited. I am going to take measurements and photos now so I can then compare in 90 days. I will be sure to share on this blog :-)

I Will Not Give Up

So last night I had a realization/determination/thought that totally rocked me. I was lamenting to my husband that the scale isn't moving quickly enough for my taste (yes, I weigh myself everyday - and yes, I know I should stop). I was getting really frustrated and feeling like maybe Weight Watchers isn't going to work for me (did I mention I started WW again early last week? More on this later!), when I had this thought, "Well, I'm not going to give up, so it has to work. I am going to lose this weight, and if I keep eating healthy, watching my portions, and exercising regularly then it is inevitable that I will reach a healthy weight." Now, maybe that doesn't sound dramatic to you, but it was kind of an 'ah-ha' moment for me. I realized, no matter what, no matter how difficult or long this journey ends up being, I will get to the finish line. I will reach a healthy weight and be happy and comfortable in my own skin. There is no failure - this is going to happen.

While I have lost weight in the past, I don't think I have ever felt this sure about the process. I feel so strong mentally right now, like there is no way I am not going to reach my goals. Failure is not an option. I am ready this time. Even if it takes me 2 years, I will get there. When I lost 60lbs a year and a half ago (I have now gained almost 40 of those back), I never felt confident or secure in the process. I kept telling my husband, "This feels too easy. I don't know what changed or why I am doing so well with my eating. And if I don't know what changed, how will I make sure it doesn't change back?" This time though, I feel so conscious and in control. I know exactly what is changing, because I am changing it. It doesn't feel 'easy,' but it feels worth it.